These days | scully's Blog

Or news today... 

Family: One aunt in contact with me (my Godmother). My other aunt (mother side) wished me my birthday. I don't search for my father, but I'll be 29 tomorrow, so I think about it. Does he? That's all. Fox is okay, he's with friends this evening. My cats are "getting along", well, not really, but they play, and it's livable. 

Friends: I celebrated my best friends' son's birthday, and mine, on Saturday. It was cool. Fox helped our friend's brother with his computer. He says he's not highly gifted, but he talks to us in seconds, when we already have problems with minutes lol. I'm good at languages, but not at maths. I guess he's really high gifted. I'm only gifted. I feel the difference. But it's not the same things we're good at, so we complete each others, intellectually. 

Therapy: still on, still meds. IN sick leave, to end September, for now. My psychiatrist will certainly ask for a long illness fill out. She'll take care about it. For I odn't lose my rights, and these years I've serached for work on the street, even by less ten in celcius, or even working for 300€/ month... .when the minimum spent per month is 1000€... My expanses there are free. I'm in a good center, followed by both a psychiatrist and a psychologist, and there'rs a medical team there, and that way I progress. I feel very lucky. We'll start an assessment, a chek-up, to see what's wrong, or what can be improved. I'm not a psychopath, not a sociopath, not schyzophrenic... but neuro-something, apprently would have social anxiety, and I'm srill insomniac, and sometimes hyppersomniac. I don't want to get get out or see people. It's so. Physically, I often feel tired, but at home and supported, I'm okay. 

Job: not until a while I guess. I'm registred to the DLC, so sevral of you asked, it's not studes, it's an exam. 3 hours in October 23. 

People: I'm fond of Fox. I know he hid soeting for my birthday 'tomorrow), but I told him I'd rather him to be to give it to me (or what's the point?). Florence is really a good friend. We don't write to each others very often or ave each others on the phone very often, but I've known her since I was born, and I was the first she talked to her new boyfriend to. She's great. I know if I needed a place "to stay becaus I'm in the shit", it'll be at her place. Aurore is cool, her husvand is acunt but she's cool. I don't live far, and I celebrated her son's birthday and mine at her place on Saturday. It was cool. In the beginning, Fox had to help her brther with his computer, something he's good at. He talks to us in seconds when we already have problems to understand in minyes. He's very gifred I told you, for numbers, counting, maths, and computer. I mean he changed memories, and opens thigs, and speaks UFO's stuff ( to e it is), and he didn't even study that. He's fucki*g good. I'm trying to convince him. Intellectually, he's above us. What I like(?) I still love Gillian Anderson, what a good heart, I'd love to now peple ike her in real life. 

I spend time on facebook. I gave my facebook some post above, formerly. I use applications there, and am linked to some family, and older friends. And X-Fies friends. And new friends. 

Health: mentally... we'll see... not dangerous for others. For me, it's another story. It could be worse. I'm rational, and reasonable, but you known when you're very hurt sometimes, after a life of being hurt, no one knows what you're able to do so I'm aware. I'm both insomniac and hypersomniac. Apparently I have social anxiety, we're checking that. I'm far from 100%, but I have time, and people ae rather nice, so I fell very privileged. 

Really, I can't tell that life is bad. My family, which I left 8 years ago, gives me time. My partner is super. My cats are great. My friends are okay, but when you know me and my distance they're great. My therapy improves, and I hold on. Just I feel so depressed sometimes. I have pictures that  come to my mind, memories. I have lots f nightmares. It's okay because I've got lots of time. ow we deal? There's no real deal, Fox is a cuties. I pay 30% to 40% of the bills (what I can afford), and I take care of the apartment, the laundry, the food (mostly), what gets to be done), for it's ore equal. *I* need to. I have more time. It makes things more comfortable. That doesn't mean I'm totally available lol that means I get things more equal, that's all. 

For those who asked, Im not going back to study, I'm taking a 3 hours exam, the DLC, October 23. Anyway, thank YOU for caring!

Not so bad, just why do I feel do depressed? I think a great part is hormonal. I guess I miss serotonine, and melatonine. We're trying to get to it, but maybe th treatment isn't what I need. ONly, it gets time to tell. And the brain is something that's unknown, and indivdualist". And for "silentvoices", individualism isn't a bad thing, it's the soul of the "mass", against distact and fascim, it's selfishness that's bad, you mix up both. 

Well, see you all? I'm going back to my facebook applicatiobns... save the xick... the poor... and the Earth...